Friday, 24 February 2012

I'm terrified.

Of social media. Namely facebook. Afraid to be vocal to voice my opinions, my likes, my dislikes. But then you realize out of your hundreds of friends hundreds of them probably are slightly wary/shy/indifferent as well. For what you see is probably 50 or so highly active vocal people that shape what mainstream is today. So. Doesn't that make 'mainstream' pliable? I should learn from my friends :) like Mafer :):)

Mutant and proud.

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Resolutions

So when a good friend passingly says, "Why so insecure?" Amidst what I would call kidding around. Brain goes into code red. Guts churn and you so wish the floor was an abyss. OR at least turn back time and have said something else. How does it slip out?

Self-confidence. So subtle, so out of my reach. Its not being over confident, not showy and boasting. Realised how often insecurity is starting to show. When I get too excited over an achievement, repeating it to myself and others. When I evade talking about what I can do because I don't know its worth. Jokes aside I guess people can see through me! Perhaps its not about if I talk to much about something or downplay it alot, but rather the way I talk about it. ARGH the transparency is sickening. Feel as if people can look into me and point and say "why is your kidney purple!"


Okay, what's that question again? Do you think you're awesome? :) Let's go think about it. Believe in yourself.